Carlton Pure Blonde

Brewed by Carlton & United Breweries (CUB)
Style: Pale Lager
Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

Not a bad beer. This is much better than the typical light beer. It’s marketed as being low in carbs, but it’s not low in taste. A bit thin and watery, but a good accompaniment to a meal on a hot Australian day.

...bottle. Well, I dunno what this trash is brewed for, but it must be a novelty for people who want to act healthy. Clear gold, no real aroma, or flavor. WAtery, flavorless marketing ploy, and it seems popular so it must have worked. Finishes metallic, and thin. Actually I would rather have water, but this was a gift.

Clear golden beer with a small white head. Little aroma of cereal and malt. Flavour is bland, watery, thin bodied. Boring. Give the low carb beers the flick.

This is simply not worth it, even if someone pays you to take it. To give you an idea of just how bad this is, I drank it at a party. I was exceptionally drunk, so much so that I couldn’t tell when someone gave a bottle of water that it wasn’t beer. When someone gave me a sample of this putrid filth, however, I could tell it was not beer, or anything even vaguely akin to it. I would like to say it tastes like water, but that would be far too high a compliment to pay this swill. One has to wonder who was the diseased mind responsible not only for this abomination, but for the very concept of low-carb beer. It’s made from grains! Like bread is. If I want low-carb, which being relatively sane I don’t, I’m not going to drink beer! Honestly, unless you are a masochist on a diet, I would highly recommend avoiding this vomitous filth like the plague.

A drinkers beer... not a tasters beer. This sells itself on two things... 1. Its low in Carbs (although... to people trying to lose weight... its not the carbs that are the issue... its the sugar and alcohol that are going to make you gazin weight) 2. It doesnt taste like beer. So even non beer lovers can drink it and pretend. This is a pretty average beer, it is light on flavour yet still good on alocohol content. It is a party beer, cheap and popular because if you want to get drunk this beer is not going to prevent that.. Its not a totally bad beer, it is refreshing and clean. But not one i would reccomend to those trying good Aussie beer.

What the hell is this supposed to be? It has words like pure and blonde and it’s sure as hell neither of them. The only connection to blonde I can see is the airhead type, which is a reasonably close case it’s like drinking wet air. It manages to actually remove flavours from your mouth and replace them with something akin to a vacuum. You have to virtually freeze the stuff to even be aware that you are drinking it. Having said all that, it does manage to leave a nasty vague metallic finish, a bit like some form of mild electrolysis in your mouth. It does look like beer, mainly because it comes in a beer bottle shape. It even sounds like beer when you unscrew (yes unscrew- we are talking quality here) the top. It then lets off a fart of metal (probably from the bottle top) mixed with whatever they cleaned the beer vats out. There’s also a hint of something else completely alien to beer - it could be the remnants of whatever bit of cloth they used to filter it or maybe the vinegar they used to preserve it. Luckily I didn’t pay for it, but I did unfortunately get given six of the buggers. Maybe with the water restrictions in Aus I can use it to water the grass, but I’m not sure I want to take the risk of it killing what little is left. It truly is on par with the most awful beers I have ever had the misfortune to taste- that’s not a dare, so for your own well being, just don’t drink it.

Sampled in Adeliade. Not a bad beer. Not much too it though. Overall flavor is quite weak but a good after work or at the bar drink.

not vegetarian-friendly. otherwise from what i remember, an overrated, weak, and strangely chemically smelling beer. forget it.